We are back from our annual family vacation at Cape Cod (“The Cape” for us locals), and while we were there my husband and I celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary. We celebrated at The Ocean House where we enjoyed an outdoor dinner overlooking the ocean. While we were there, we brainstormed our secrets to a quarter century of staying together (I guess one of our secrets is that my husband indulges me when we make lists such as this!).

Here is what we came up with:

  1. Refrain from commenting when your partner hovers over the chips and salsa.
  2. Learn new things together.
  3. Support each other’s independent endeavors.
  4. Be willing to negotiate.
  5. Have similar values.
  6. Reflect and learn together.
  7. Travel to new places together.
  8. Commit to being individuals, together.
  9. Be honest with each other.
  10. Be comfortable sitting together in silence.
  11. Schedule date nights and follow through with them.
  12. Accept that you will have different interests.
  13. Accept each other’s flaws (we all have them).
  14. Do fun things as a couple.
  15. Play to each other’s strengths.
  16. Be adventurous together.
  17. Listen to each other’s music (as difficult as that can be).
  18. Work on developing your listening skills.
  19. Make your partner laugh prior to important medical procedures.
  20. Parent a puppy together prior to having children.
  21. Live together before getting married.
  22. Be flexible.
  23. Talk about the hard stuff.
  24. Make room for healthy competition.
  25. Take lots of selfies together.
Selfie of a couple
Taking a selfie together.

What are your secrets to staying together? Email me at drkimburns@gmail.com or connect with me on Instagram at @drkimburns. You can also sign up for my newsletter, Some Things to Think About, that I send out every two months.

Kim signature

3 Responses

  1. Great list Kim! And, each one is so important. We will celebrate our 48th this year. One thing I learned a long time ago is to agree to disagree and move on!

  2. Kim, This is a lovely list! Congratulations on 25 years. I remember when you met, your bridal shower weekend, your first puppy, first kids…..

Leave a Reply to Karen M Townsend Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *